From Encyclopedia Dramatica
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There comes a time in every man's life when situations spiral out of control and he finds his back against an wall. Maybe somebody stole his iPod. Maybe he just killed his wife and kids. Maybe he looked in the mirror and saw a Fucktard. Maybe you can't live with the fact that you're a washed-up actor who's addicted to sex with Thai ladyboys. Whatever the reason, you can either get up and face the music, or you can tell the world and whatever deity you believe in to fuck off. In the latter case, pull out your list of final solutions and place a check in the suicide box, because tonight, you dine in hell.
Simply pwning oneself IRL is no cause to become "An Hero". Without exceptions, "An Heroes" are made, not born. You cannot fucking be An Hero, get over it!! When otherwise normal and rational people fondly eulogize and honor those that have killed themselves before them, that's when "An Hero" is made. Like it or not, somebody out there probably gives a shit about Kurt Cobain. Could anyone say the same about you? That's why you'll never amount to anything. You'll never be "An Hero". Don't let us stop you from trying, though. Having said that, becoming an hero is shit because you won't get to see the results of your successful endeavors (assuming Hell doesn't have a live broadcast of your funeral, you absolute pancake). However, if you do a school shooting and don't kill yourself, you just might. With a lot of luck. Don't expect not to get raped and murdered in prison, or executed in the electric chair. There is no half/almost/soon An Hero. Either you blow your brains out and become An Hero or don't, but in your case, please do.
The phrase "An Hero" dates back to 2006, in reference to the prototypical An Hero, Mitchell Henderson, who famously shot himself after losing his iPod. /b/tards jumped on a grammatical error made by many of his MySpace friends, and it is now immortalized as the banner under which we mock those courteous enough to remove themselves from the gene pool. Since then, an heroes of all ages have bravely been removing themselves from the gene pool, including 3 year olds.
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i dont wanna go to prison
17 year old lolcow on the forum commits identity fraud. Forum users report him to the FBI to watch him freak out.
Did You Know...
From Encyclopædia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:
- ... ED found a new frontend, so you can continue browsing the website. For like the 40th time.
- ... ED found a new provider, so we can continue having the offended page
- ... that Zaiger Nuked the forums. Join us on EDF3 - No zaigers allowed
- ... that Zaiger tried to create his own ED, with no users, and shitty content
- ... that Twitter verified us! Follow EDdotSE.
- ... that there's also ED_NewPages and #EDAOTN?
- ... that Art Bell, famous conspiracy radio host, has "died" and possibly has been taken out by the NWO for knowing too much?
- ... that some female tried (and failed epically) to prove she was as good a killer as a man when she only managed to wound some geeks at JewTube?
- ... that #BlackLivesMatter is still trying to prove that everyone hasn't forgotten that waaay out of fad hash via the white massa' that runs it now?
- ... that some some Syrians got killed or bombed or gassed or something and that it's something that Western nations should give a flaming shit about?
- ... that Dan "Show me your Feet" Schneider (best know for TV shows All That, Good Burger/Kenan and Kel, Drake & Josh, and iCarly) has been fired from Nickelodeon after a lengthy reign of terror?
- ... that a Flat Earth Truther tried to launch himself into space with a home-made rocket?
- ... that a Maryland (USA) woman attempted to punish her autistic son, ISIS-style?
- ... that Burger King is not a fan of teh drugs?
- ... that a woman in Florida called nigger a nigger, humped his arm, and schlicked all while in his custody?
- ... that a woman who used a plastic penis to dupe her dumb, blindfolded girlfriend into believing she was actually a man has been jailed?
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